Year: 2005
Duration: 01:16:18
Directed by: David DeFalco
Actors: Kevin Gage, Sage Stallone, Kelly K.C. Quann, Maya Barovich, Chantal Degroat
Language: English
Country: USA
Also known as:
Description: We open this film with a text warning of some kind stating that the movie’s contents are just as brutal as the everyday occurrences that they portray (or something along those lines). Uh-huh. Here I am thinking that I’m watching a “Last house on the Left” remake and in reality, it’s a “Blood on the Highway” style High School, cautionary film. Actually, just joking on that last one.
Anyway, the plot. As I said (and as most know), this is a remake of “Last house on the Left“, which was also a remake. There really is no difference at all except for a few meaningless changes. You know the story. Two girls go to a concert (oh sorry, a “rave”) looking for some “dope” (oh, sorry again, I mean “X”) and wind up finding the wrong “dealer’s” son. They’re subsequently brutalized/raped/murdered segueing into the assailants seeking shelter in one of the girl’s homes (after their van breaks down). The father recognizes his daughter’s belt on one of the perpetrators and we get all “revengey” now.
I’m going to be completely in the minority here (or even all alone) and say that I was entertained by this one. The performances were really not bad and Gage (as Chaos) was completely believable (and enjoyable) as evil incarnate. Was it yet another pointless remake? Yeah, I guess so, but it was pretty darn good all the same. Those two chicks did thespian peril justice here and I believed in their every cry and scream. The effects were pretty good also, though there was admittedly very little shown (except for the most realistic “nipplectomy” I’ve ever seen). There is one thing very different about it, but I won’t go into any major spoilers here.
I’d actually read Ebert’s review some months ago and thought that I’d have to visit this sometime (even though he gave it no stars). It was not his anti-praise, but his description that made me curious. I’d forgotten all about it until I’d researched a little bit about what I had in my possession here.
On another note, I was about to turn this off (since the credits were rolling) and something caught my eye that made me hit the pause button. It read as this, verbatim: “Based on an original idea by Steven Jay Bernheim and David DeFalco”. Okay. I’m sorry, but just who are these idiots (or more correctly, is that what they take us for)? Entertaining or not, that’s probably the most ridiculous credit line I’ve ever read. I’m not sure how they even got away with it, unless “LHOTL” is in the public domain now. Even if it is, everyone knows what a crock of sh*t that is. These guys must be wackos or something.
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“The performances were really not bad and Gage (as Chaos) was completely believable (and enjoyable) as evil incarnate”
Is an understatement. This is probably the most forked up movie I’ve ever seen. I recommend it if you can stomach it.
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This is probably the hardest movie I’ve ever seen. Non-stop until the end.
Simple minded people get scarred from stuff like this, seriously.