Year: 1971
Duration: 01:10:01
Directed by: Art Lieberman
Actors: Frank Corsentino, Haji, Michael Finn
Language: English
Country: USA
Also known as:Bang Bang, the Mafia Gang, Sex or Bust, The Melon Affair
Description: The print used for the upload is titled “The Melon Affair”. IMDB calls it “Up Your Alley”. Something Weird boxed it up and sold is as “Bang Bang the Mafia Gang.” I really don’t care exactly what they wish to phone it because all I know it because is “Another Movie With Uschi’s Boobs”. Feel free to phone it that yourselves. FYI – Not my rip so thanks to whoever took the time. Here’s SWV’s write-up –
Bet you didn’t understand Woody Allen once starred In a Seventies skinflick comedy about mobsters in Hollywood where he got his face hidden between the boobs of USCHI DIGART and also had a sex scene with HAJI. Well… he didn’t. But Woody-Alien wannabe FRANK CORSENTINO did. Though the bad man really isn’t funny despite being a dead ringer for Woody and having Allen’s shtick down pat, it’s nonetheless nonetheless a bit disconcerting to see an almost-Woody surrounded by therefore much feminine flesh and even smack in the middle of an R-rated orgy.
Corsentino plays a nebbish named Seymour (naturally), who lives with his mother, works for a catering organization, and spends his time daydreaming about being with naked females. In Bang, fact! Bang! The Mafia Gang often reminds one of the nudie cuties of a decade earlier where a comic would wander through a landscape of shapely nudes without ever getting any. It’s pretty a lot the same thing here except that the nudity is much more explicit and the fake Woody gets to nail both Uschi and Haji.
Information technology happens when Seymour is assigned to cater the “film festival party” of “the many popular as well as the most beautiful woman in all Hollywood, “Maria Manina (cat-eyed Haji, best understood for Russ Meyer’s Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill! And Great Morning… and Goodbye). Complete of nude people (combined with sexploitation starlets these types of as TERRI JOHNSON and LYNN HARRIS) and billed by Maria as “the freakiest party of them all, the bash quickly engulfs Seymour who gets stoned and leaves in a daze. Another Maria, day satisfies ultra-fat Mafia employer Don Marco whom is pretending to be Fellini, uh, rather, Fettudne, the “noted international movie director” as a method of smuggling jewels, hidden in his crotch, into the U.S. Nevertheless, the moment Don Marco gets into Maria’s car, he tells her to take off her clothing which is when Woody… uh, Seymour, pops up in the back seat, providing a startled Don Marco a deadly heart assault. Haw, haw!
But since Maria’s stepfather is being held hostage until the jewels are offered, she begs Seymour to get into Don Marco’s oversized garments and pretend to be “the head of the entire Cosa Nostra.” Information Technology also means Seymour must replicate Don Marco’s voracious sexual appetite even though Seymour is, of course, nevertheless a virgin….
The hilarity…The hilarity….
Oddly, for a movie that up until today has remained instead obscure, Bang! Bang The Mafia Gang was in launch through most of the Seventies under a number of games. Originally shot and released as Up Your street, the title had been then changed to Bang! Bang! The Mafia Gang (aka just The Mafia Gang), then Sex or Bust, and finally The Melon Affair, the moniker on this print.
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